Wed - 9 Jan
Ever felt your life was ‘too noisy’? Of course you have, we all have. There are times when you just want to grab your mind by the scruff, give it a good shake, and tell it to shut the f up.
A sign that all is not well
I woke up and was assaulted by an ongoing drama in my life. It keeps appearing at the most inopportune moments - like when I wake up from a reasonably good nights sleep. Bang, the door (to my mind) opens and I’m hit by a ‘wall’ of noise. Even recalling that to write this makes me wince.
I’ve found by catching that feeling early enough and recognising the noise allows me to take steps to begin to quieten my mind -my life - my world.
Awareness and meditation
First, I notice what is happening. Next, I take steps to calm my mind. This morning, I instinctively entered into a meditation on sound. I focused my attention on what I could hear. My clock ticking. The hum of the radiator. The traffic outside. Sounds close to me. Sounds far away. Every time the ‘internal noise’ nudged me, I would refocus on what I could physically hear. As I became aware of refocusing, I could feel an instant change in my body. I tested visualising ‘opening the door’ a few times and the wall of noise returned. I repeated the listening meditation until I ‘felt’ I was ’quieter’.
Only when calm could I switch my thinking
I became curious of how I would make a physical image of the noise within my head. I could picture it but know I can’t do it justice in a drawing, so I wondered how I would represent the concept using photography. I hadn’t fully left the meditation but was using visualisation as the focus now rather than listening.
I have a strong visual sense and photography is my preferred medium. I began to think about how to capture the concept of a noisy mind in a photograph.
After a short while, I tested ‘opening the door’ and insted of being hit by a wall of noise, the sound had become softer - it appeared in a visual manner, like a heavy shower of rain. I suppose if I were to use words, I could liken the first image to being engulfed in a raging storm, lightening bolts and thunder - the lot. The second image was more like opening the door to a downpour.
That’s it for this morning’s insight into my world. We all experience storms, downpours and sunny weather. Sometimes in the same day or several times a day. It has taken me several years to come to the place where I can begin to cope with the worst storms.
I’ve been learning meditation for several years. Using visualisation is my most recent tool. It’s a continual learning experience. I am so grateful that it helps me.
How do you weather your storms?